Easy, Cheesy Toaster Pizza


Remember the days before you knew about dairy farming, when you’d come home from school and pop a frozen Ellio’s pizza into the oven and just 10 minutes later you’d have a crispy, cheesy treat to eat while watching Duck Tales? This delish snack I created is similarly satisfying (and much healthier for you and the cows). This recipe is 100% vegan, dairy-free, super easy, really yummy, and fast! Now all you need is a cartoon to watch…

Easy, Cheesy Toaster Pizza

what you’ll need:

  • 2 slices of organic, whole-grain sourdough bread
  • 4 tbsp organic tomato sauce
  • 1/2 small onion
  • 1 tsp olive oil
  • 1/4 cup raw cashews
  • 1/4 cup plain rice or almond milk
  • 1 tbsp nutritional yeast
  • 1 tsp agave nectar
  • pinch of salt & pepper
  • 2 drops black truffle oil (not required, but very yummy)


  1. In a blender, combine cashews, rice or almond milk, nutritional yeast, salt, pepper, agave, and truffle oil until smooth. Set aside.
  2. Slice the onion, and in a small pan, sautee over medium heat with a teaspoon of olive oil until golden.
  3. Take the 2 slices of bread, and spread about 2 tablespoons of tomato sauce on each.
  4. Drizzle the cashew cheese you’ve made evenly on top.
  5. Top with the sauteed onions.
  6. Toast in a toaster oven for about 5 minutes, or until the cashew cheese begins to brown.

31 Responses to Easy, Cheesy Toaster Pizza

  1. Tamara says:

    Ooh, that looks yummy. Want to hear something nasty – when my brother and I were young, our after-school snack (scarfed down while watching Duck Tales, it’s true) was a big slice of cheese slapped onto a piece of foil and melted in the oven. Just melted cheese. GAG.

  2. Jason says:

    Looks delicious! I can’t wait to try it. Then, I’m going to try it with grilled portobellos, too. Grilled portobello and caramelized onions makes the best pizza topping combo in the world. Maybe I can hulu (used as a verb) DuckTales, too. . .

    “Ducktales! Woo-oo!” (Sung just now. . .obviously.)

  3. […] Discerning Brute: Easy, Cheesy Toaster Pizza by Joshua Katcher “Remember the days before you knew about dairy farming, when you’d come home […]

  4. Jo says:

    Looks like shit on a plate. I’m gonna go eat some dairy!

    • It’s funny because I was gonna name it “shit on a plate” but then realized with all the feces that is actually in dairy products (in addition to blood, pus, and baby cow stomach parts AKA rennet) it would be misleading. Enjoy your shitty, bloody, pus-filled, veal-parts dairy! 🙂

  5. Jo says:

    Actually, joshuakatcher, whoever informed you that there are blood, feces, pus and “baby cow stomach parts” in dairy products totally misinformed you. As a proud dairy producer, I can honestly say there is NONE of that in the milk we sell nor in the products made from that milk. There are regulations in place to make sure of that.

    Yes, rennet (used to coagulate milk in cheese-making) originally came from the stomach lining of baby calves (back when the first cheesemakers in Europe discovered the process). Today, science has allowed cheesemakers to formulate a synthetic form of rennet, so there is no “baby cow stomach parts” involved.

    The source of your misinformation wants you to believe those “facts” so they can put an end to animal agriculture, because they view animals as our equals. Try feeding the entire world on a vegan diet – not gonna work. If veganism is your choice & prerogative, fine – but don’t believe & promote misinformation.

  6. Jason says:

    Jo, what the Hell are you doing on a vegan blog attacking vegans? I mean. . .you’re a “proud dairy producer”, so what business do you have here other than possibly being somewhat guilt-ridden and curious about the truth?

    Meanwhile, to clear up some of your misinformation, mammalian rennet is STILL used today amongst cheese-makers, as is vegetable and microbial. However, these aren’t modern scientific discoveries as you suggest. They’ve actually been around for quite some time. On the other hand, genetically engineered rennet, which was obtained through calf genes. Again, treating cows and calves as commodities.

    Even if you don’t believe that animals are our equal, you have to be cognizant of the fact that they have a central nervous system, and thus experience fear, pain, and joy. Their own survival instincts would not lead them to making the choice to be hooked up to machinery, staying pregnant for the majority of their lives (until they’re too old or tired and have to be sold for meat, pet food, leather, etc.), or immediatley giving up their young (yes, mother cows experience pain at the separation from their young, which I’m sure you know as a “proud dairy producer”).

    You also have to admit that the industrialization of animal agriculture has NOT served mankind’s best interest in terms of health or even the issue of world hunger. Feeding the entire world on a vegan diet may seem far-fetched to you, but I would assume that’s because you don’t have a firm understanding of what it means to be a vegan and aren’t schooled in plant agriculture. (I grew up on a farm, so I’m not even going to go there with you.)

    Back to your original comment, “Looks like shit on a plate.” Wow! Grains, nuts, and vegetables look like “shit on a plate” to you? You know, I find it rather judgmental, uneducated, unrefined, bovine (yeah, I went there), etc. (believe me, I could go on) for you to make such a statement about a health that is natural, healthy, and would probably do wonders for the cholesterol of someone like you.

    And, just so you know, if consuming dairy is your choice and prerogative, fine, but don’t believe and promote misinformation.

  7. Jason says:

    *I didn’t finish the sentence above. “On the other hand, genetically engineered rennet, which was obtained through calf genes, is commonly used and though deemed “synthetic” is still a byproduct of cows. Again, treating cows and calves as commodities.”

  8. Jo says:

    I’m not attacking vegans…I’m simply trying to correct the misinformation you’ve been fed all your lives. And no, I’m not visiting vegan sites because I’m questioning my values, or “guilt-ridden” – I’m simply signed up to an animal welfare news feed to keep up (and try to give agriculture a voice) on many of these sites.

    I will respectfully agree to disagree…but I also know that a vegan society will not do any better at curing world hunger.

    Over and out…to go eat a juicy burger!!

  9. Tamara says:

    Jo, I hate to tell you, but statements like “looks like shit on a plate” and “…go eat a juicy burger!!” tend to argue for the fact that you ARE in fact attacking vegans. Your attitude is clearly confrontational and defensive.

    As for the idea that you’re here to “correct the misinformation you’ve been fed all your lives,” I’d like to point out that the majority of vegans were not raised vegan or vegetarian. Most of us were, in fact, fed misinformation and lies about food and animals during the early years of our lives, but those un-truths came from the meat and dairy industry. For many of us, it was a long road to discovering that the things we had been taught all of our lives were false; you obviously haven’t reached that point yet in your life but I sincerely hope one day you will.

    I am also confused by your perception (sadly, seemingly shared by many) that there is some nefarious group that is working to spread ‘lies’ about meat and dairy. If you look at that idea objectively, it simply makes no sense. On one side of the fence, you have the behemoth meat and dairy industries – their profitability and continued existence relies on hiding the horrible things that they do to animals from the public, and numbing us to our innate sense of compassion and empathy for animals. On the other side of this false dichotomy, you are proposing that there is a force that benefits somehow – financially? I don’t get it – from spreading messages of truth, compassion, and love. I don’t know about you, but I tend to trust the motives and methods of the latter group over the former.

  10. Jason says:

    “No habit or quality is more easily acquired than hypocrisy, nor any thing sooner learned than to deny the sentiments of our hearts and the principle we act from: but the seeds of every passion are innate to us, and nobody comes into the world without them.”
    ~Bernard de Mandeville

  11. Thanks Tamara and Jason!

    Oh, Jo…
    Are you telling me that not one of your cows has mastitis? And If you have “prevented” or “cured” it in all of them, aren’t people drinking antibiotics in the place of the pus and blood? And like all mammals, don’t cows have to be pregnant to lactate? And doesn’t this result in the veal industry? Any way you slice it, every glass of milk contributes to the veal industry. And yes, feces contamination in dairy is rampant. There are measurable amounts in most dairy products. Plus, it’s just not healthy. Human adults drinking the breast-milk meant for the infants of another species? Doesn’t that just sound weird – objectively speaking?

    Now, I better get back to spreading this “misinformation” I’ve been told all my life (ha!) – because it’s not that I care about preventing unnecessary suffering or shedding a light on an industry shrouded in multi-million dollar whitewashing and greenwashing campaigns that are taking a huge toll on the health of many people, it’s because I am getting so rich off of writing things like this – what a joke, Jo!

  12. Jo Vegan says:

    JoBitch just needs to take her meat chomping ass somewhere else.

    And what Jason said is correct about rennet. Most companies use animal based, especially in hard cheeses.

    JoBitch should also educate herself in pop culture, because if she did, she would know that blogs aren’t USA Todays Or NPR shows (unless they want to be). The style is much more relaxed and casual and for Joshua to say “baby cow stomach parts” is perfectly acceptable-those who read this blog know what he’s talking about.

    You can’t possibly treat your animals as equals-otherwise you’d be sent to the slaughterhouse once you’re menopausal and can’t produce children and milk…Hmm…but what if humans were treated that way…like, the ones that get on my nerves…Moving on

    In addition, you wouldn’t send your son to the meat factory days after being born because (unless cows are getting sex changes these days) he’ll never be useful to your industry.

    That shit on the plate looks delicious. I can’t wait to try it!

  13. Cybergrunt says:

    Mmm I’m going to try this when I’m back in yeast flakes (they are so hard to get in my part of Australia!)

  14. Jo says:

    “Oh, Jo…Are you telling me that not one of your cows has mastitis?
    – Correct. None of the cows in my herd currently have mastitis. We watch closely at each of our 3 daily milkings to make sure of that.

    “And If you have “prevented” or “cured” it in all of them, aren’t people drinking antibiotics in the place of the pus and blood?”
    – No. When a cow gets mastitis and is put on antibiotics, her milk is dumped, meaning it does not go into the food supply. A truck load of milk is tested at least 7 times between the farm and the plant to make sure there are no traces of antibiotic – and a trace as small as two parts per billion would show up as a positive test. If an entire load would happen to test positive, that load would be dumped and would not go into the food supply – and since a sample is taken at each farm, the plant can prove who the culprit is – and that farm is then financially responsible for that entire load.

    After the last dose of antibiotics given to a cow, it takes four full days for the cow to ‘clear’ and be safe to go back into the food supply – and her milk is tested before it ever goes in the tank. This is a prime example of the ‘misinformation’ I stated above.

    “And like all mammals, don’t cows have to be pregnant to lactate? And doesn’t this result in the veal industry?”
    Yes, it is true that a cow must have a calf in order to lactate. We raise the female (heifer) calves as herd replacements. On our farm, we also raise the male (bull) calves as steers. If veal calves are raised in a healthy, humane manner, I don’t see a problem with offering veal as a meal option to those who choose to consume it.

    “And yes, feces contamination in dairy is rampant. There are measurable amounts in most dairy products.”
    – Please show me the proof to back up this statement. There is absolutely no feces present in dairy products. Period. Back to the testing of every load…

    “Plus, it’s just not healthy.”
    – 3 servings a day of dairy provide humans with the calcium, phosphorous, and Vitamin D necessary for bone & teeth growth and maintenance. If you don’t like the fat content of whole milk products, there are skim and low-fat varieties available. Dairy is nature’s most healthy food product.

    “Human adults drinking the breast-milk meant for the infants of another species? Doesn’t that just sound weird – objectively speaking?”
    -Humans domesticated the cow for both parties to benefit. Cows received care, food and shelter in return for providing the humans with a nutritious & healthy product. Doesn’t sound weird to me!

    • Oh I see, you must live on a magical farm where Pasteurization happens just for fun! Where every cow says “thank you” as she’s shipped off to slaughter, and all that “crazy” evidence is invalid. You wanted evidence, right? Well, according to the Center for Disease Control:

      Many foods have been associated with E. coli O157
      outbreaks. These include those of bovine origin (e.g.,
      ground beef [3], roast beef [4], and raw milk [5]) and
      foods likely contaminated by bovine feces



      Consumption of raw milk was
      implicated as the source of infection in 30 of the 80
      outbreaks of human campylobacteriosis reported to CDC
      between 1973 and 1992.


      That took me about two minutes of research. I’m sure I could find much more evidence if I wanted to waste my time trying to convince a dairy farmer that she should find a new job.

      You said:

      “If veal calves are raised in a healthy, humane manner, I don’t see a problem with offering veal as a meal option to those who choose to consume it.”

      I can almost hear you saying “If people keep slaves in a humane manner and feed them and clothe them, I don’t see a problem with offering slavery as an option to those who choose to participate.” In fact, countless people, politicians, and industry leaders made that exact appeal. They thought they were doing the right thing. Imagine that?

      What’s the problem with both of these scenarios aside that people just like you and I were able to rationalize the most horrible forms of oppression? It’s that the interests of the individuals being affected is ignored. Guess what Jo, it’s not a personal choice issue. It’s not just about “you and me and our mutual difference of opinion”. There is a legitimate, valid third party whose interests have been ignored and are structurally invalidated. It’s the same for any other social justice issue.

      It’s amazing that anyone thinks there is a “humane” way to take a baby from it’s mother, steal her milk, and then kill it. You hit the nail on the head with this sentence. Those who CHOOSE to consume – because at the end of the ordeal – at the very bottom line, it is in fact a CHOICE, at least for most of us, as to whether we consume animal products.

      It’s a very simple equation, Jo: If A) something causes harm, distress, and death to an animal who has a will to live, and B) that ‘something’ is not necessary for survival, it becomes moral responsibility of those who would like to live in a compassionate and sustainable world to avoid causing harm where it is so easily avoidable.

      In addition, animal agriculture is a huge contributor to global warming, and unless you pretend it’s not happening, people like you are responsible for that.

      And the fact that lactose intolerance is so rampant contradicts your “nature’s perfect food” nonsense. If you are a calf, then yes, it is nature’s perfect food.
      Goodnight Jo.

  15. Jo says:


    “The style is much more relaxed and casual and for Joshua to say “baby cow stomach parts” is perfectly acceptable-those who read this blog know what he’s talking about.”
    -I fully understand that blogs and forums are much more relaxed. You and the others who read this blog may know what Joshua is talking about, but that doesn’t make the terminology correct, and just shows that you are just as misinformed as he is. How many of you have ever actually set foot on a farm? Or is your view of a farm just that from a PETA or HSUS video?

    “You can’t possibly treat your animals as equals…”
    – I never said I treat my cows as equals. Cows are not my equals. They are cows, I am human. They have a reason and a purpose to be on this Earth, and that is to serve as a source of food for humans – without that purpose, the species would be extinct. There is a difference between our species. Do I treat them with respect during their lifetime? Of course. They have access to good food, clean water, a safe, warm, dry place to sleep, a pasture for exercise, and in turn they provide me with milk (and in the case of beef animals, meat). A healthy cow is a productive one…and an unhealthy cow would be unproductive. So why wouldn’t farmers do the best they can to make sure their cows are healthy?

  16. Tamara says:

    Wow, Jo. I can’t thank you enough – your posts have CHANGED MY LIFE!!! I am now free from the bonds of caring, compassion, and critical thought! You’ve shown me the way! Never again will I waste a single second of my life trying to make the world a better place! From here on out, I’m going to have blind faith in a corrupt food system that puts corporate profits ahead of my health and safety! I bow down to you, oh goddess of human superiority and entitlement!!!

    (Now will you go away?)

  17. Jason says:

    “3 servings of dairy a day provide humans with calcium, phosphorous, and Vitamin D necessary for bone & teeth growth and maintenance. If you don’t like the fat content of whole milk products, there are skim and low-fat varieties available.” (And the most egregious) “Dairy is nature’s most healthy food product.”

    First of all, the Vitamin D is ADDED to the milk sold on the market, as specified by the federal government. Hardly natural as you suggest. Secondly, milk protein actually DEPLETES calcium out of our bodies, counterproductive to any calcium that could be gained from consuming it, and it has been linked to the onset of insulin-dependent diabetes in children. Third over one in six Americans (that’s more than 50 million people) are severely lactose intolerant. Why? Because we stop producing lactase when we are very small children. Our increase in milk-consumption has also been linked to the obesity rate in America. Of course, that’s a no-brainer. Cow’s milk is designed to grow a small calf into a 2,000 lb. cow. Duh!

    Also for you information, there are NO sound scientific studies that show that consuming milk deters osteoperosis. However, even our own federal government (the FDA) admitted that a vegan diet would be ideal for Americans but said they couldn’t suggest it because they believed the general public would consider this a “change that may not be acceptable.” (Yes, sweetheat, this actually happened: Food and Drug Administration, Department of Health and Human Services under FDA Contract No. 223-88-2124; Task #9.)

    Better sources of calcium: kale, collard greens, spinach, bok choy, black beans, orange juice, etc., etc., etc.

    Better source of Vitamin D (which, meanwhile, added to milk also contributes to our inability to absorb the Calcium in it): SUNLIGHT! (The same way every other living creature on this planet gets it.)

    Phosphorus: You’re kidding, right? You’re in far more danger of having too much than not enough, and virtually the only way of not having enough is total malnutrition. Furthermore, it’s a mineral found not only in every animal product, but every plant product as well. You do know that HIGH levels of phosphorus leads to bone disease, right?

    Lastly, it’s naive to think that the best and only sources of these nutrients are animal-based. What about cows? They too need calcium, Vitamin D, and phosphorus. Ha! And, they are a HELL of a lot bigger than we are (most of us). Where do they get it? Come on, I know you know the answer! PLANTS!!! Oh, I have a better one! What about ELEPHANTS!!! They too need calcium, Vitamin D, and phosphorus, and they need a HELL of a lot more than cows. Guess where they get it from, sweetheart! Come on, I bet you have a clue. Okay, what the hell. . .I’ll tell you. PLANTS!!!

    Alright, I’m spent on this. No more posting from me. I’m exhausted, so I’m not even going to attack her about the sad veal comment she made. I’ll just meditate and chant on her behalf. If any of you pray, you can do that as well. Let’s all try to work on behalf of each others’ karma. (Yes, even Jo’s because we’re all in this together.)

    That’s all I have to say. If I need to present a works cited list or bibliography or something, Jo, provide me with your email. My education at Yale (pretentious, I know) taught me to be able to do MLA in my sleep.

    Peace. . .love. . .hope. . .compassion. . .change. . .AMEN!

    Peace out, my vegan friends!

  18. Cybergrunt says:

    Thanks Joshua, I do use Vegemite for some things and it would prob be fine for this. I’m going to give it a whirl tonight. It does kind of lose its ‘cheesy’ flavour when it’s turned into a big black goo tho. It’s still best on thick crunchy toast with lots of vegan marg. Hungry now!

  19. Cybergrunt says:

    Jo, why do you care what we do if none of it affects you personally? Nothing we do harms anything, not ever ourselves and our beliefs are compassionate and see animals simply as they are, as animals. Unlike the dairy industry we do not enforce our fellow creatures into slave-like bondage for our own ends. We are living proof that doing this is 150% unnecessary to live as simple, happy and healthy human beings.

    While you are entitled to your own opinions we do not share said opinions as we have our own, perfectly scientifically verified ideas on the way things are and how we would like them to be. We are a simple enclave of like-minded people who gather and talk about simple things like food and clothing and animal exploitation and cruelty. When you create your own blog championing the exploitation and murder of innocent animals to grease the selfish greed of ignorant, unthinking humans, please make sure you invite us all along so some of us can repay the favour?

  20. Tamara says:

    “Jo, why do you care what we do if none of it affects you personally?”

    Because it DOES affect her personally – and financially. If enough people felt the way we do, she would go out of business. That’s the problem with making money from exploiting other sentient creatures – personal investment and greed blind the producers (and consumers) of these products to the ethical atrocities they are committing.

  21. Cybergrunt says:

    “Because it DOES affect her personally”
    Perhaps, but that is not the intent. If someone insults the place where I work I do not feel they are insulting me personally. If someone doesn’t use our products and services then I do not feel affronted. This person needs distance from their work if they are so easily offended and feel such a small group of people is a threat to their livelihood.

  22. osric says:

    C’mon folks, this “proud dairy farmer” is a troll. Don’t bother trying to defend your vegan perspective against someone who is just looking to pick a fight.

  23. Jo Vegan says:

    This was great! Licking my fingers right before I type…

    I added dashes of oregano and basil to the tomato sauce to give it a more pizza saucey flavor. I also made an entire pizza on gluten free rice crust versus the bread, which required quadrupling everything (about 1 cup of cashews, almond milk, etc.)

    Cat wouldn’t get away from me while eating it. She loves nutritional yeast.

    Thanks again for a great recipe Joshua!

  24. kevin says:

    Why black truffle oil as opposed to white? (I only have white in my house, not really sure what the difference between the two are.)

    • In general black truffles (and the oil) are best when you are going to heat the oil for any length of time. White truffles are more aromatic but loose flavor and aroma quickly if heated for more than a few minutes.

  25. […] Of course, once David does some more investigative journalism into vegan foods, we’re sure he’ll discover all the awesome vegan substitutes for the things he’s missing-like making a homemade pizza with cheese made from cashews and almond milk. […]

  26. BUNGIE says:


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